Porn Can Hurt The Quality Of Your Relationships
Despite the incredible complexity of the human brain, at least one thing is clear—as human beings, we are hardwired for connection.
While the importance of love and connection has been a popular topic of study among philosophers for thousands of years, modern neuroscience confirms that we are neurobiologically wired to develop meaningful relationships with other humans
As a world-renowned researcher and author Dr. Brené Brown has stated, “We are psychologically, emotionally, [and] cognitively… hardwired for connection, love, and belonging. Connection, along with love and belonging… is what gives purpose and meaning to our lives.”
To some extent, we all share the desire to love and be loved in healthy relationships. So, how does porn fit in with our biological instinct to connect with others? The fact is—not so well.
The impact of porn on relationships
To start, dozens of studies have repeatedly shown that porn consumers tend to have lower relationship satisfaction and lower relationship quality.
Porn consumers tend to experience more negative communication with their partners, feel less dedicated to their relationships, have a more difficult time making adjustments in their relationships, are less sexually satisfied, and commit more infidelity. Research also shows that porn consumers tend to become less committed to their partners, less satisfied in their relationships, and more accepting of cheating.
Meanwhile, partners of porn consumers also report negative effects, such as lower self-esteem, worse relationship quality, and less sexual satisfaction. Research also suggests that porn consumption can undermine trust in a relationship and fuel couple conflict.
Obviously, relationship problems like these are not new and are not solely caused by porn. Yet, research shows that porn can play a substantial role in fueling these issues—and that’s not something that should be ignored.
With less trust, poorer communication, and less relationship satisfaction—all of which are important pillars of healthy relationships—it becomes clear why many porn consumers tend to struggle in their relationships. In fact, research also shows that porn can negatively impact whether or not couples stay together.
Reports consistently show that porn consumers are twice as likely to later report experiencing a divorce or breakup—even after controlling for marital happiness, sexual satisfaction, and other relevant factors.
One study, for example, tracked couples over a six-year period to see what factors influenced the quality of their marriage and their satisfaction with their sex lives. The researchers found that of all the factors considered, porn consumption was the second strongest indicator that a marriage would suffer. Not only that, but the marriages that were harmed the most were those of individuals who viewed porn the most.
According to another study, individuals who watched porn alone reported twice the rate of cheating on their partner in comparison to couples who didn’t watch porn at all. And interestingly enough, individuals who viewed porn alone and with their partners reported three times the rate of cheating.
Ultimately, the research showed that those who never viewed pornography reported higher relationship quality—on every measure—than those who viewed pornography alone.
Patience with progress
The research is clear—porn is not a harmless pastime, especially when it’s hurting a romantic partner.
But the research is also clear that shame is not an effective way to motivate someone to change. According to one study of individuals trying to quit porn, researchers found that shame actually predicted increased pornography consumption while guilt predicted sustainable change.
So if you’re trying to give up porn, be kind to yourself and be patient with your progress. Like anything, it takes time for the brain to recover, but daily efforts make a big difference in the long run.
On the surface, porn may seem harmless, or may even seem like a good way to learn more about sex. Maybe a committed relationship seems far away in the future, or you feel confident that a little porn won’t harm your relationship. But the research is clear—porn can have devastating impacts on relationships.
There is no substitute for real connection, and porn isn’t worth risking that.
Read the full article at https://fightthenewdrug.org/porn-can-hurt-the-quality-of-your-relationships/
At 423 Communities International, our doors are open for business. We are still offering recovery options for those struggling with temptations and trauma around pornography, sexual fantasies, and addictive behaviors. Want more information? Click here: https://www.423communities.org/join